Conflict

March 28, 2013

Conflict

I wander through
my day-to-day
existence. Fine,
but things seem gray.
But that’s all right,
it’s all okay,
My element
-al passion play
is actually
a throw-away
the way I feel
right now, today.

And then you reach
out, talk to me,
and all my dread
-ful apathy
is swept away,
I’m undersea,
I cannot breathe;
our repartee
wakes my senses
makes me feel free.
And makes me fear
and want to flee.

But looking back
at my dull life;
its lack of joy,
its lack of strife,
and all my wishing,
all my grief,
my hopes for more
cut like a knife.
The things I do
seem empty, rife
with pointlessness.
This is no life.

And so I then
look back to you,
and see the joys
(and sorrows too)
that wait there for
me, all seems new.
I struggle, fight
what I know’s true
because I can’t be
in love with you.
I have a life.
You know I do.

But still my soul
longs for our love.
Longs for the days
of hand-in-glove,
of long warm nights
of making love
and holding on
and I think of
our passionate
and pleasured love
and angry spats
like fire above
and know that you
are my true love.

And how I long
to turn away
from my whole life,
from stodgy gray.
And run to you,
be led astray.
With no remorse
my life betray.
But there’s the bite
the edge, the fray.
To do as I
would like today,
we would then
cause such dismay.
I think again.
I turn away.

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